Kinda like how when you make your own sandwich, it doesn’t taste as good as the deli’s. Or how when you bake your own cupcakes, you don’t like eating them as much as the bakery’s. Or how you love your $5000 boutique buy, that $5 thrifted name-brand vintage is your most prized possession.
Sure, it’s gratifying that you can work for your own of something, but it’s kinda just something that happens and then maybe you move on to a new challenge.. Unlike when we just luckily happen upon a treasure. Bc it’s easier to enjoy something that just happens bc we really had no control over matters; and those times that we do have control leave room for doubting our choices.
Nobody ever really gets jealous of hard work, bc it’s validated and achievable. But how often are we jealous when someone is luckier than us? What makes someone more deserving of luck than us? Nothing.. Luck is left to chance, and we get no say..
When it comes down to it, we value luck a little more than hard work; not bc we don’t appreciate hard work, but bc luck probably won’t happen twice. We just want things to go our way, even against all odds.. Luck.
Just ugh.
I’ve never been this happy with myself.
It feels so good. I could cry.
He helps the sheets and blankets stay on the bed because I’m a crazy sleeper. Burying my body under his to anchor myself to as I drift into dreaming. The bed is warmer. Fingers skimming silhouettes in the darkness until our heavy eyes give in. And in that moment, I’m sure it doesn’t get much better than this.
I can not emphasize enough the gravity of appreciating what you have when you have it.
Because one day, it may no longer be yours. Not completely gone but just gone from you. And God forbid you have to watch someone else appreciate it.
"He is the lamb; she is the slaughter. She’s moving way too fast, and all he wanted was to hold her. Nothing that he tells her is really having an effect. He whispers that he loves her, but she’s probably looking for so much more than he could ever give: a life free of lies and a meaningful relationship. He keeps his hands pinned down at his sides. He waits for it to end, and for the aching in his guts to subside."
- Sic Transit Gloria by Brand New
